


Heavy

by madlaw



Series: All About The Music [6]
Category: Person of Interest (TV)
Genre: Canon Compliant, F/F, Post Stock Exchange, Shaw wonders
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-01
Updated: 2017-05-01
Packaged: 2018-10-26 16:17:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 567
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10790151
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/madlaw/pseuds/madlaw





	Heavy

 

_I know I’m not the center of the universe_  
_But you keep spinning round me just the same_

_Heavy - Linkin Park (Feat. Kiiara)_

 

* * *

 

I wonder when she started feeling this way about me.  The way where its obvious I’m the center of her universe.  She smiles at me with her whole body and no matter what I say or do she just smiles like she knows something I don’t.  She treats my scowls and eye-rolling like declarations of never-ending devotion.

But mostly I wonder when her code got hardwired into my central nervous system so now instead of being me, and well her (far away from me), we’re a “we.”

I wonder when I started letting her into my personal space like she belongs there; although if I’m honest she’s gotten away with it since day one.  Once someone tases, zip-ties, and kidnaps you, it seems pretty pointless to keep them at a distance.  (Plus I’m afraid to find out I can’t (don’t want to) actually do it.) 

I wonder when I started sharing my food, or at least not stabbing her with a fork when she takes it.  Not that I was ever able to actually stab her. She’s just too quick, (or maybe I was never all that motivated).

I really wonder when I started letting her touch me.  She brushes my shoulder, molds her body to mine, (mostly in a gun fight, but during the Simon number we were sitting on a bench and she draped her arm around my shoulder and sat so close her breath was tickling my ear and I didn’t push her off), and if we’re in the same room she’s never more than a foot away from me.

I also wonder when everyone else started viewing us as a unit.  Okay so I argued for her release from the cage, and took off on a mission to Alaska on a second’s notice, and left John to rescue Finch so I could make sure she didn’t get herself killed, among others. No one seems to believe those actions were all about the mission (not even me).

I care about her now.  I’m not sure when I started well _feeling_ for her.  Maybe the day she rescued us from Control.  Especially me since I was about to get two bullets to the head (I went to find her after everyone was safe, but she was gone).  Or maybe when I saw her fire two guns at once for the first time; that was so fucking hot.  Or during the Simon mission when Finch was so cavalier about her being expendable in the fight against Samaritan; I went to look for her then too, but she was gone again.  Or when she rescued me from Martine when my cover was blown; by then I expected her (knew she would be) the one to come for me.

But there are things I’m not wondering about too.  I’m not wondering why I walked into a hail of bullets and certain death; mostly for her.  I’m not wondering if she’s looking for me; of course she’s looking.  I’m not wondering if she’ll give up on finding me; she won’t.  I’m not wondering if I’ll kill her in one of these simulations; I won’t.

Finally I’m not wondering what I’ll do when (not if) we’re back together again.  I’m holding tight and never letting her go.


End file.
